the kaleidoscope

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I gotta say what’s in my mind
Something about us
doesn’t seem right these days
life keeps getting in the way
Whenever we try, somehow the plan
is always rearranged
It’s so hard to say
But I’ve gotta do what’s best for me
You’ll be okay
I’ve go to move on and be who I am
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own away
Don’t wanna leave it all behind
But I get my hopes up
and I watch them fall everytime
Another colour turns to grey
and it’s just too hard to watch it all slowly fade away
I’m leaving today ‘coz
I’ve gotta do what’s best for me
you’ll be okay
I’ve got to move on and be who I am
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this
world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own away

Troy
What about us?
What about everything we’ve been through?

Gabriella
What about trust?

Troy
You know I never wanted to trust you

Gabriella
And what about me?

Troy
What am I supposed to do?

Gabriella
I gotta leave but I’ll miss you

Troy
I’ll miss you

Gabriella
So I’ve got to move on and be who I am

Troy
Why do you have to go?

Gabriella
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand

Troy
I’m trying to understand

Gabriella
We might find our place in this world someday
but at least for now

Troy
I want you to stay

Gabriella
I wanna go my own way
I’ve got to move on and be who I am

Troy
What about us?

Gabriella
I just don’t belong here
I hope you understand

Troy
I’m trying to understand

Gabriella
We might find our place in this
world someday
but at least for now
I gotta go my own away (3x)

the song’s lyrics is just ideal for me. when you really get to absorb the message of the song, you can say that at this days, it’s really very difficult for someone to tell those lines in a mannerable way. when i get to hear this music, it makes me think that somehow we need this lines some time, someway. we don’t have to risk  our personal lives when we are not sure of our situation anymore, when we need the time to be of our own. once a person is into a reationship, it isn’t necessary that you have to be together at all times- whatever you do and where ever you have to go. somehow, a person still needs his/her privacy for that someone to have his/her best. even if considering the fact that you are partners, still you have your own plans to accomplish. anyway, we have the saying that if you’re meant to be, then you’ll be.

i hope partners out there get to realize these things and considerations.

oh!what a great day. ..i just feel like i am cursed. from the time i slept ’till i went home from school.

it started when i dreamed of a really worse event. i was dreaming that my family and all the people was being chased by a "mutant" killer. there was no way to kill him or even just to weaken him. i was trying to save my family but i couldn’t. i was running for my self as fast as i could, not even feeling tired but seems like i could not get farther.

i wasn’t killed anyway and that silly dream did not have the ending because i woke up when my phone alarm rang and it was 5:30 in the morning then. i was planning to wake up earlier than my highschool cousin for me to use the bathing room first.

i usually take a bath atleast 15minutes so i need to have enough time to prepare for school-do all my stuffs (kaartehan bah!).i hate it when my cousin get to take a bath first because she finishes at 6am and i don’t get to prepare my self anymore…grrr. i’d be going to school looking pale and i still have to go to the toilet room to put on powder and lip gloss.

when we where about to go to school, i have not combed my hair yet. i thought that it was only me and my younger brother that my father will be sending to school when UNFORTUNATELY my BELOVED cousin took a ride. i decided to get out from the car and just take up the tricycle since i will surely be late when i go with them and in fact, i really hate to be be with her. so i got back inside the house to fix myself and 15 minutes before my 1st class,i will be leaving. and so i left.

i was glad i reached school before the bell rang. surprisingly, when i was in the classroom there was only me and my other classmate. we were wondering why there was only the two of us so we checked every corner of the school to where they could possibly be. however, we could not find them. i waited for almost 30 minutes and still no one came…

this is great! i woke up early,took a bath with a very cold water and just finding out that i don’t have my 1st class period when my next class is still at 9am…(sigh!) i just made my undone assignments out of my vacant time.

luckily, during my 9am class,i was quite inspired. we had an oral recitation and whoever participates will get a chocolate!and i had 3!yummy! after a while, before our class ended, a friend of mine who’s also a friend and a classmate of my crush called me to ask something. while my friend was talking to me, my crush was staying behind and i was very flattered when he looked at me and smiled. that made my curses vanish and replaced it with an inspiring day…hmmm thanks to Aphrodite!